The Face Palm Chronicles

I’m a red-blooded, God-fearing, gun-slinging, alpha-male patriot born and raised in Trumpgolia. My people are facing a serious problem in 2073 A.D. and it’s one that needs rectified: The preachers told us the commie libtards on the other side of the wall conjured up the devil to possess our womenfolk into digging their way out of the Fatherland....

I had a life in the Normal States of America— a wonderful, safety-pin-awesome, it-just-doesn’t-get-better-than-this kind of existence. As a successful artiste, beloved daughter, and one of New York City’s most desirable catches, no woman could have asked for more. And then in the year 2073, “he” came along...

One moment my life was near perfect...